Love between Couples - Guidelines of the Heart by Ryuho Okawa 165 -

Aug. 20, 2018（Last Update: June 13, 2026）

This month's 'Guidelines of the Heart' discussed the warmth of love between couples and the complementary love that couples share. We asked Sakuko Hagiwara, the head of the Happiness Science Urawa branch, about ways for couples to complement each other and build a happy family.

Ryuho Okawa's original work 'Guidelines of the Heart' is serialized in the Happiness Science pamphlet Monthly 'Happiness Science'. Branches nationwide also display posters, and it is widely known as the monthly face of Happiness Science.

For those who want to read the guidelines in the monthly magazine, please see Monthly 'Happiness Science' September issue.

Unable to understand my husband...

After reading this month's 'Guidelines of the Heart', I felt that even in this era of 'efficiency' and 'cost-cutting', we must not forget the existence of love and other important things.

I have a husband and currently two daughters in their twenties, but I have also felt various conflicts. When my eldest and youngest daughters were still young and had chickenpox, the nursing lasted a long time, and I was feeling gloomy, but my husband said he would take a day off and go out with friends.

I was filled with anger, thinking, '(He doesn't understand family and children!)' and I ran out of the house with the children. However, on the way back to my parents' house, my mother called and said, 'You can come back anytime, but come back with all four of you,' and I was taken aback.

(I hadn't considered my husband's feelings and was very self-centered...).

When I returned home after reflecting, my husband also apologized, and we reconciled. I felt it was a good opportunity to understand each other's feelings.

For couples to complement each other

President Okawa teaches that in a couple's relationship, it is important to 'think from the other person's perspective', 'suppress the ego', and 'respond flexibly to changes'.

I have been trying to change myself by learning these teachings. For example, I support my husband with words of encouragement, and I try not to blurt out my opinions impulsively by taking a breath before speaking. Also, I made it a point to express gratitude to my husband together with the children.

By being mindful of such things, I feel that we have been able to build a good relationship.

I feel that couples can learn 'human relationship studies' in this way. Two people raised in environments with different values build a single family, creating a family utopia where one plus one becomes more than two. I think that's the wonderful aspect of love between couples.

Moreover, since a couple's attitude reflects one's own heart, if you change yourself, the other person will change. Let's learn the correct heart with this teaching and build a happy family where we give and receive love.

This content is reprinted and edited from Monthly 'Happiness Science' No. 379.
The very popular 'Guidelines of the Heart' is also available for regular subscription in the Monthly 'Happiness Science', so please take advantage of it!

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